Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Always Waiting.

I feel like lately, I am always waiting. Always waiting for something to happen, for something to work out, for something to become ok. Always waiting.

One thing I am waiting for is for my manager to find us a new contract so I can get back to work. It sucks that our candidate didn't win in the elections and therefore we lost our contract. I really hope he finds something...if he doesn't I don't know what I will do. This job is perfect for me, it's a work from home and I can basically build my own hours. It's perfect for a spoonie. But I just don't know how much longer I can wait. We don't have any money, and things are getting tough. I've looked at "regular" jobs, but I just don't see myself being able to handle any of them. *sigh*

One thing I'm waiting for money for is to get a membership at a pool or a season pass to the beach. Everyone says that swimming is great exercise for fibro, and easier on the body then most other exercises. I need exercise so bad. My body is so weak, and I've gained alot of weight. I need to do something, and I feel like this is the best bet. I just wish it wasn't so damn expensive to do so. Has anyone had any luck finding cheaper ways of doing this? Will you share please?

Another thing I'm waiting for is my thyroid medication to get in and work. I was told it can take 4-6 weeks, and it's been 3 weeks today. There are some days I think it is working, because I can stay up for the whole day....but there are other days when I sleep so much it's ridiculous. I mean sure, I know I'm still going to have some fatigue due to Fibro, but my doctor seems convinced that this is going to actually make a difference, so I'm holding on to the hope. And waiting.

And as much of a downer as this makes me know what I'm waiting for the most? For things to get better. That's really all I want.

1 comment:

  1. If you have a friend with a pool, that would probably be the cheapest solution, but I'm sure you've already thought of that. :)

    I'm in much the same boat, having gained weight and lost muscle at the same time. If I buck up and do a little more one day, I'm exhausted the next two, and have to nap a lot. It sucks. Oh well, I'm not "super" like a lot of people - I need rest. ;)