Stress Overload

I am completely and 100% in stress overload mode. If there was something to go wrong, it has in the past few days.

The biggest problem, is, of course related to my medical care. My insurance copays are going up, like ridiculously. Some of my medications are going to be $75! My doctor copays are going up a lot too, different amounts depending on what type of doctor/specialist they are.

I have finally started to get a network of doctors/specialists and medications to get me feeling at least a bit better, and now I may lose all of that because I can't afford the huge copays. I already owe hundreds of dollars to various medical places.

I can not get any kind of assistance because I am a college student. (Apparently that makes you ineligible for anything and everything here in Maine.) I can not seem to find a job that I can physically handle.

This is just too upsetting. I've been depressed, stressed, and anxious since finding this out. I don't know what to do, and all I feel like doing lately is crying. It just isn't fair.

This is probably a crappy explanation of it all, but I just don't have enough in me right now to write a proper post. Feel free to ask questions. Or give advice, I'd greatly appreciate that!

Nervousness

My next appointment with my regular doctor is tomorrow. I'm not usually nervous about my appointments, but this one I am.

At my last appointment, I asked him for a referral to a rheumatologist because my fibro is not even close to under control. My fatigue is ridiculous, not much of anything helps me sleep, and I'm constantly in pain. I have to do something to try and feel better, as much as I can. He basically flat-out refused and just told me I needed to have weight loss surgery, and that would cure about 90% of my fibro issues. This is complete bullshit! There are people who are very skinny that still have fibro, and besides, I've been losing weight slowly on my own anyways, and that's the healthier way to do it. This has frustrated me to no end.

It made me think that I should find a new doctor, which I have been trying to do. But, different factors, mostly my insurance, is making it incredibly difficult. Only certain doctors are covered, plus I'd have to switch to the new doctor right away, before I even got to talk to them. That makes me completely uncomfortable. What if a new doctor would be just as bad or worse? And all my referrals would be missed up, my scripts would be messed up, etc. So basically my insurance is just making a difficult situation even more difficult.

So tomorrow is my appointment with him. I am going to tell him that I am not doing the weight loss surgery. I've heard enough about it to scare me. And apparently you can't take your meds for a while after? No way. I refuse. I'd never function then. I'd have migraines 24/7, my trigeminal neuralgia would flare constantly, my anxiety level would be insane, I'd have so much pain, and would never sleep. No, I absolutely refuse. I don't know what he'll say or do after I tell him this. I want to ask again for the referral, but I don't know how to go about it. I don't know to convince him. *sigh*